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Welcome to the March 2006 issue of the Inner Brat Newsletter. Welcome, new readers. If you enjoy this newsletter, please forward it to your friends and encourage them to subscribe. All they need to do is to send a blank email message to innerbrat-subscribe@topica.com. If you have comments or questions, feel free to email me at drwallin@drwallin.com.
	IN THIS ISSUE • Perspective can really make a difference • Inner brats in the news • How have you tamed your own inner brat? • Inner brat tip of the month: Tip for changing perspective • Announcement: Author seeks personal stories • Distribution information
• PERSPECTIVE CAN REALLY MAKE A DIFFERENCE •
Look at the pictures below. (They're supposed to be fuzzy-looking.) One face looks angry; the other looks calm. But which is which? Think it's the one on the left that looks mad? Step away from your computer and look again. From a certain distance (it varies from person to person) the facial expressions will be reversed. This optical illusion was designed by Aude Oliva (MIT) and Philippe Schyns (University of Glasgow.) Here's what happens in your brain as you look at the pictures: Each picture is a hybrid of both a calm and an angry face. And each contains both "fine" and "coarse" detail. The left picture has the angry expression in fine detail, and the calm expression in coarse detail. The right picture is the opposite - calm expression in fine detail, and angry expression in coarse detail. Your eyes see it all, but your brain only pays attention to part of the picture. Up close your brain notices the fine detail in the pictures: angry in the left one, and calm in the right one. But from a distance your brain now only pays attention to the coarse detail, which is calm expression in the left picture and the angry expression in the right one. You might be able to get the same effect just by squinting the second time that you look at the pictures. Squinting changes the focal length of your eyeball, which is another way to shift between the fine and the coarse detail. I've used this illusion to demonstrate that what you see is a function of your perspective. Depending on how you look at a situation, you may see very different things.   How does this relate to your inner brat? Your inner brat sees only one perspective - that which leads to instant gratification, instant power or instant relief from exertion. Your inner brat is interested in only the immediate, close-up benefit. In the process it fails to see some of the unintended consequences. Your inner brat is the part of you that's still a 2-year-old. Small children are naturally self-centered and they lack the ability to view a situation from more than one angle. That's why they get frustrated so easily. They don't see other options. But as you mature, you learn to see different perspectives. Taking a different view helps you transcend frustration, anger, and even temptation. For example: • When you are stuck in traffic you can either allow your inner brat to fuss and fume, or you can use the time to pay attention to the radio. Either way you might be late to your destination, but depending on your perspective, you will end up either calm or frustrated when you get there. • If someone does something that annoys you, you can either give your inner brat the power to dwell on it and make you angry, or you can direct your attention elsewhere so that the annoying behavior is no longer "center stage" in your mind. • When your inner brat tries to rationalize your needing a high-calorie snack because you are a little hungry, you have a choice. You can either think about how hungry you are; or you can remind yourself that in this mildly deprived state your body will have to burn its own fat. Next time your inner brat threatens to take control over you, "step back" and look a the situation again, just as you did with the pictures above. You may be surprised at what you see.
Need a speaker for your next conference, luncheon meeting, or event? Send an email to: drwallin@drwallin.com or call me at 717-761-1814 for more information. In my book, "Taming Your Inner Brat: A Guide to Transforming Self-defeating Behavior," you will learn other tricks to keep your inner brat from making mountains out of molehills. There are 3 ways to buy this book: ~Visit your local bookstore ~Order online from my web site: www.innerbrat.com ~Click here to go to Amazon.com
• INNER BRATS IN THE NEWS • A California man sued for damage to his car by a city-owned dump truck. Coincidentally he was the one driving the dump truck that hit his car. And he admitted that the accident was his own fault. When the city denied his claim because it was tantamount to suing himself, he had his wife file the claim under her name, for $400 more than the original claim. A daycare worker in New York who was charged with raping and sexually abusing a 4-year-old boy claimed that the child had seduced her. A woman who lost her camera while on vacation was contacted by someone who found it. The catch was that the woman who found it decided not to return it, because her 9-year-old son had become attached to it, "and we can't bear to take it from him." For more stories about brats in the news visit my website.
How have you tamed your inner brat? Tell me about your inner brat - how you learned to recognize it, and what you did to keep it from controlling your life. If you could take a "before" and "after" picture of an inner-brat situation, what would it look like? Send your stories to me at: drwallin@drwallin.com Dr. Wallin in the media In the past month I've been quoted in Us Weekly, Real Simple, sheknows.com, the Harrisburg Patriot-News, and WHTM-27 news. Watch for more quotes from me in upcoming issues of Fitness and Glamour.
• Inner Brat Tip of the Month: Having trouble changing your perspective? • Here's something that works for many of my therapy clients and coaching clients, especially when it comes to frustration or disappointment: Finish this sentence: "At least . . . " Completing that sentence immediately transports you to a different angle on the situation. It won't necessarily make everything better, but at least it will interrupt your negative, inner-brat thinking. • Announcement: Author seeks personal stories of family conflict • Cheryl Dellasega, professor at PSU and author of four books on relationships, is seeking stories about sister to sister or sister to sister-in-law tensions within families. If you have a story to share or want more information, contact Dr. Dellasega at opheliasmother@aol.com
Until next month, Pauline Wallin, Ph.D. www.innerbrat.com Copyright 2006
• Distribution Information • This newsletter may be quoted, reprinted, or forwarded to others as long as the content is not changed and the subscription, copyright, and contact information is included. If you would like to post this newsletter on a website, please contact me for permission at drwallin@drwallin.com. NOTE: The content in this newsletter is for informational purposes only. It is not intended as a substitute for personal consultation with a professional, or as any type of psychological service. The inner brat is NOT a psychiatric diagnosis. If you are having difficulty just getting through the day, this is more than just your inner brat. In this case you are advised to consult a mental health professional. This newsletter is hosted by Topica.com. Topica may include advertisements for unrelated products. I have no control over these ads, but they do help pay for the expenses of distribution, which keeps the newsletter free of cost to you. Copyright 2006 Pauline Wallin. All rights reserved.